Pastor Claude Thomas Blog

Author: Pastor Claude Thomas

For something to be strong and influential, values must be built into it. So it is with the family. We must have high values for our families. And again, we turn our attention to the Bible to gain a perspective of the values that build strong families. Paul, the Apostle, wrote a letter to the Ephesians and in chapters 5 and 6 he gave guidance for experiencing great relationships in the family.First, value the relationship of the husband and wife. The husband is to love and lead his wife, v. 23a, “For the husband is the head of the wife” = strongly leads. And he is to lovingly lead his wife, v.25, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church…”= he sacrificially loves his wife.    Then the wife follows and respects her husband, v.22, “Wives submit to your own husbands…”= respect him and follow him.    Dads and Moms who give high priority to building a biblical relationship with each other are on their way to building a strong family. That relationship affects everything in the family!

Second, value the relationship of children to parents. Children, in action be obedient and in attitude be respectful. Listen to what he wrote in 6:1,2 “Obey your parents and honor your parents…”.    Students and children who listen to what God says about the relationship with mom and dad will add to their own well-being. If you will obey and respect them, it will be a positive thing for you all the days of your life!
Third, value the relationship of parents to children. Listen to what he said in v. 4, “…do not provoke your children to wrath… bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” = avoid provoking the children by being a poor model, “do as I say and not as I do,” and sending negative messages that demean them.

Then positively parents are to nurture the children toward maturity with words and ways of reinforcing instruction and encouragement.   Parenting isn’t easy work. Someone said, “About the time we learn how to do it our children are grown and gone.”  Well, there is some truth there. Maybe that’s why God gave us a rather direct and easily understood guidance… avoid provocation and actively teach and nurture!  Each relationship within the family is important. Husband and wife. Wife and husband. Parent and child. Child and parent.   Now there is reason for this and the reason is simply right is best. ROI is a symbol well known in the business world. It simply designates the return made on investments. If the investment is good then we expect high yield or return. Well, Paul and current research reveals the same thing. If we give high value to the relationships of the family, we receive high value from those relationships! After twenty five years of research of over 14,000 families around the world, Stinnett and Beam concluded, “We are confronted daily with evidence that the quality of family life is crucial to our happiness, emotional well-being, and mental health.

There isn’t a question about it any more: We know that poor relationships within the family are related to many problems in society.” (Fantastic Families. Stinnett and Beam, p.5).    Value the relationships within the family because the return is of great value!